Category: Consumer Goods

Dragon vs Cock

As you’ve struggled through the seemingly annual sriracha shortages, you’ve probably found yourself buying a sauce that ends up being significantly inferior to the beloved Huy Fong Foods version, if not downright revolting. I am happy to report that the bottle with the dragon, from Underwood Ranches, is excellent. Underwood is literally the company that made the chilis that Huy Fong used until the legal battles (that caused the shortages). They countersued Huy Fong and was awarded $23million in compensation, so now they have enough money to make a SUPERIOR sriracha, which unsurprisingly tastes like the old version of Huy Fong’s sauce. Side by side, the dragon sauce is more blood red, hotter, a bit better, and gone. I’ve only seen it in Wegman’s.

Mattress Wars: Saatva vs. Keetsa

I guess this is the kind of hard hitting content I’ll be including on my site from time to time. Reviews of ridiculously and fancily named mattress companies. I’ll make it quick.

I hadn’t bought a mattress in 14 years and needed one pretty badly. A dear friend was happy with her Saatva mattress, although told me about some complications, so I decided to give it a try. They consistently lied to me about when it was arriving, insisting it would arrive on X date, and then X date and then a third date about a month after purchase. When it finally arrived it was like a gag-mattress. 3.5×1″ short of a king. Wider on top. You could see the slats and the floor beneath it. It didn’t fit on the Article frame, which I also had to return because the screws didn’t tighten and was making horrible noises every time I moved. I cancelled the Saatva and, in their defense, they have pretty good customer service. Smart kids who all live in NYC, I think. They gave me a refund before they even picked it up. For the record the mattress felt “just ok” but it was not super comfy. Also, buddhist mattress my ass.

Keetsa on the other hand was very pleasant to deal with. Their philosophy is to be less pushy than most mattress sales people because people hate that and it works. They delivered the mattress the next day. It was an actual king size bed and quite comfy. Slightly too firm (all of their mattresses are very firm) but not in a debilitating way. I think I’m gonna really like and it. A high quality product. I used to be militantly anti-memory foam but a foam/spring hybrid is not the worst idea ever. Keetsa for the win.